As I stepped onto the bus and began to consider my seating options I couldn’t help but notice an empty seat on the left side of a beautiful woman. The choice would have been obvious had she not met my eye with disappointment. She could read me like an open book. Beautiful women will always yield an uncanny control over man’s confidence and behavoir. So, as usual I found this nice window seat a couple of rows ahead of her, as if to counter the rejection. I would have said I was playing hard to get, but I would have been playing alone. That is not such a fun game to play alone – it’s even up there with twiddling the thumbs.
The north coast of Jamaica is quite beautiful as one travels from Port Antonio to Kingston. On the other hand, the road is the equivalent of a roller coaster on gravel. The buses that drive that route every day are some seriously deranged looking vehicles compared with the nice, new buses that I take from Santa Cruz to Kingston. While traveling to and from Porti one is delayed here and there by road work. I do not think they are fixing anything, but they sure made my day better by giving hot girls the stop/go sign.
About half an hour outside Porti the bus stopped and opened its gates to yet another fine looking young woman. The bus was still very empty and she had a variety of seating options. She could have sat next to a woman holding a screaming baby, or shared the whole back seat with a schizophrenic. There were some school children romping in the front of the bus. I would have never guessed she would have come to my row and plopped down right beside yours truly – especially not with such wonderful alternatives.
For those guys who are not an ace with the ladies – let me give you some advice. When a pretty girl sits down beside you and you say nothing at that particular moment of arrival – you have wasted your best opportunity to strike up a conversation. Now, you are going to sitting there and 1) wait for a conversation piece, or 2) come up with something so stupid to say that your flirtation is blatantly obvious. And that is exactly what I did. That’s ok. She is still stuck here beside me.
That brings me to both my favorite and least favorite thing about Jamaica – Fiv’in up: that is squeezing five human beings in a space that is meant to seat four. This does not even take into consideration the fact that some booty is much larger than a seat. In fact, some booty can take up two seats. Most of the time this situation puts me in a grave discomfort, but not on this trip. Whoever this girl had affection for, she decided to sit next to me and that means she is going to be my main squeeze for as long as she is on the bus.
(Disclaimer: If you are not formally an item it is probably best to keep such feelings to yourself. Touch is always nice when it is consentual, and if not, they dont have to know they are consenting to anything. The good thing about the bus is that you dont have to ask).
